Don’t Give Your Audience Indigestion with Hotdog Stories
A hotdog story is story that has bits and pieces smashed together. Much like hotdogs, a listener doesn’t know what’s in your story.
These kinds of stories mix a mess of non-story ingredients with the ‘story’ which makes the story difficult to find. The speaker sounds jumbled and the audience gets lost in the verbal spam.
Let’s examine traits of hotdog stories, so you can do the opposite and insights on how you can tell a non hotdog story.
NOTE: The story example is an incomplete fragment that starts at the beginning and is exaggerated to include traits to avoid in your stories. The ‘. . .’ indicates a content cutoff gap
Traits of the Hotdog Story vs Story
HOTDOG
- Low to nonexistent story nutrients
- Interrupting the story flow with excessive non story details like quotes, statistics, charts/graphs, acronyms and exercises
- Only give bits and pieces of story details which makes a choppy flow
- Squeezing everything in the world together in hopes of making a ‘story’
- Audience struggles to find the story
- Switching rapidly between morsels of story, chunks of lecture, and bits of ramble
- Vagueness that makes a listener has to guess, ‘what am I listening to?’
STORY
- story nutrients (characters, scenes, plot, action, dialogue)
- Story has a logical flow with relevant details
- Give enough story details from start to finish which makes a smooth flow
- Only the story world is shown
- Audience sees and follows the story
- Stays within story mode
- An audience knows they are listening to a story
Comparing Hotdog Version vs. Story Version
HOTDOG VERSION
I had to secure the loan or the project would fail. Calvin Coolidge said, “Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence.” I had to persist to secure the loan. From Mesopotamia to Elizabethan England loans existed which means I exist in the timeline of loans . . .
I got rejected from 7 the banks. Did you know 10/10 people will fail if they stop? I couldn’t stop. I had a 30% chance of getting the money. But only a 50% chance that I would get the 30%. Now let me show this the 19 column 47 row chart of statistics on loan probabilities . . .
I set up a meeting with Rutherford Shalanks as I last effort. Let me tell you about the N.I.C.K.E.L. acronym for persistence which stands for notice possibilities, inspire confidence, cork ego, keep trying, expand possibilities, let go of fear . . .
Once I secured money, I’m reminded of Pt Barnum quote about money, “Money is an excellent servant, but a terrible master.” Suddenly I felt dirtier than a little leaguer’s muddy baseball uniform. Here are my top 17 tips for handling loan money responsibly . . .
STORY VERSION
I had to secure the loan, or the project to convert the mall into an apartment complex would fail. At the first bank, after I told the loan officer my plan she took off her glasses, leaned back in her chair, and shook her head. “You’re crazy. The mall is abandoned. Neither we nor any other bank will give you a loan.”
I called my business partner from the parking lot. “Lambert, there is no way we will get the loan. Let’s forget the idea.”
“Nonsense. Persistence will make us find a way we haven’t discovered.”
Lambert was right. There were other banks. After visiting 7 more banks I only had the echo “NO” in my ears.
While I ate my meatball sandwich at an outdoor café I read up about unconventional loans. I set up a meeting with Rutherford Shalanks for a hard money loan.
We sat in his dim office with the blinds drawn. Mr. Shalanks looked over my proposal on the mall. “I can give you funds at 13% interest, 2 years to pay us back, and you have to put 30% down.”
I extended my clammy hand over the desk. “Deal.”
The main problem with hotdog stories is the story is hard find with everything else happening around, inside, and outside the ‘story’.
When you hear a hotdog story you need to take a break and munch on a handful of antacids as you recover from the verbal indigestion caused by the ‘story’.
Commentary on improvement
- Non story elements from the Hotdog Version like statistics, quotes, the loan chart, the acronym, and loan handling tips disrupt the story flow and take the audience out of story mode. The Story Version stays in story mode and directs all focus on getting a loan for the real estate project.
- The Hotdog Version happens in a nebula. You’re not certain where the speaker is in relation to the story world. The Story Version provides the story with defined spaces for the speaker’s action to happen (bank, parking lot, outdoor café, Mr. Shalanks office).
- The nonstory elements in the Hotdog Version scramble the tension about securing the loan. The Story Version builds to a crisis and a resolution.
- The speaker blathers in the Hotdog Version by talking outside the world of the story. In the Story Version the speaker comes across as a storyteller and the speaker enters the world of the story. Notice how dialogue and description transports the speaker into the story.
- Due to switching between story mode and blathering, the Hotdog Version makes the mistake of skipping how the speaker secured the loan. The speaker is more interested in the non story elements like another quote and tips for handling loan money instead of showing how he got the loan with Mr. Shalanks. The Story Version has a logical flow which culminates with the speaker securing the loan in Mr. Shalanks office.
- The Hotdog Version fails to connect with the audience whereas the Story Version connects with the audience.
Other story styles to avoid and suggestions for storytelling improvement:
Stay Away From Telling Trampoline Stories
Don’t Tire Your Audience with a 100lb Suitcase Story
Would you like to transform your storytelling abilities then contact Nate.